PRAYER IS LIKE A TRICYCLE

One wheel is thanking God.

When someone gives us a thoughtful gift or does something very kind for us, we are touched. Moved. We want them to know we feel a deep sense of gratitude, so we do what comes naturally; we thank them. When we experience what we call blessing or goodness or abundance in our lives, again, we are naturally moved to thank someone. In the context of prayer, that someone is God.

Another wheel is asking God.

When things go wrong in our lives or we learn of a pressing need (e.g. for physical, relational, or emotional healing) felt by someone we love we often turn to God in prayer. To do so comes naturally, in part, because many of us were taught to ask God for help in our earliest bedtime prayers…and we’ve never stopped asking! This is good. Even Jesus taught his disciples to do so using the most famous biblical prayer of all…the Lord’s Prayer (Matthew 6:9-13).

These two wheels of prayer are critical and valuable. But there’s one more…listening to God. And this isn’t the kind of listening where we do it just long enough to think of our response or rebuttal to what we're hearing. This is listening without an agenda.

Virtually all religions include this third wheel of prayer. People have different names for it (contemplation, centering prayer, meditation, reflection time, etc.), but what name we assign to it is far less important than what it is!

Because it’s so different from the first two wheels of prayer, this one takes some practice. And, if you’re not already doing this, it’s understandable. To carve a niche out of our in our already-full lives to listen attentively for God may seem impossible, if not a little crazy. But seriously, what do you have to lose? And who knows? You may be delightfully surprised and moved by the experience. Further, the ensuing spiritual adventure may give you new-found perspective and courage to rethink some parts of your life that may not be working so well. Even 15 -20 minutes a day for a week can begin to open our eyes to a wonderfully refreshing and transforming way of navigating the complexity of life...as well as discovering brand new ways of making a difference in the world.

Most of all, you’ll begin to experience what it’s like to move through life on the wheels of a truly personal and life-transforming relationship with God.

"Be blessed, God; train me in your ways of wise living. (Psalm 119:12 NRSV)

YOU MAKE MY LIFE BEAUTIFUL

I love the way, the ways, you make my life beautiful
You surround me with beauty
You enfold me and immerse me in your ways of seeing it
You delight in it…and it delights me
A maker of beauty, you make my life beautiful

          I love the way, the ways, you shift my center
          So I can see beauty through your eyes
          So I see what I wouldn’t otherwise see
          Giving joy to my spirit, lightness to my soul
          A seer of beauty, you make my life beautiful

I love the way, the ways, our eyes look at the same thing
Yet yours see beauty where mine don’t
You even see beauty in me when I can’t
And you sculpt the beauty that lies within the stone of me
A shaper of beauty, you make my life beautiful

         I love the way, the ways, you fill me with beauty
         My soul and my surroundings
         You fill me with its impressions, its expressions
         Everywhere I look…if only I will look
         A beaker of beauty, you make my life beautiful

I love the way, the ways, you help me build bridges of beauty
Bonding the playful, whimsical to the thoughtful, inspiriting
The momentary and temporal to the eternal and divine
The physical to the spiritual
A bridge of beauty, you make my life beautiful

          I love the way, the ways, you give witness to the beauty you see
          In nature’s splendor around you, in you, through you
          In situations and circumstances beyond your control
          A herald of beauty, you make my life beautiful

I love the way, the ways, you aren’t just a maker of beauty
Not just a seer, a shaper, a beaker, a bridge, a herald of beauty
I love the way, the ways, you are beautiful
More, you are beauty itself

LOVE'S DEEPEST LONGINGS

Who can you share your innermost thoughts, feelings and fears with? Who can you give your deepest self to with abandon and never regret it? Who can you trust will never be tempted to share your secrets? Who will never betray, deny or sabotage you? Who will love you more than you love yourself…even when you don’t?

We need someone who knows us better than we know ourselves. We need someone who will be more honest than we are willing to be with ourselves, someone who refuses to play the games and who refuses to let us play them either.

Valentine's Day, with its "romantic" love is a beautiful thing. But considering the complexity of the human experience, it's easy to see we need someone who will love us with something deeper and longer lasting.

We need someone who, unlike us, hasn’t honed their human rationalization skills to a razor-sharp edge. We need someone whose first reaction is not to be defensive. We need someone who won’t back away from integrity no matter what the cost—and will lovingly speak the truth about our own lack thereof. We need someone who won’t justify our egocentric approach to everything and everyone. We need someone who isn’t living in constant denial of the realities right in front of us. We need someone who will help us see what we can’t see with our own limited vision, be it physical or spiritual. We need someone who will help us see that we are worthy of receiving love and are worthy of giving love.

In other words, we need someone who will help us see that we're each as beautiful and lovely as a rose...but we're not the only bloom on the bush.

That someone is God.

“As a deer longs for flowing streams, so my soul longs for you, O God.” (Psalm 42:1 NRSV)

SHAME SHADOW

You may have heard the saying, “If you see a snake, never mind where it came from!” Sound advice when it comes to snakes. When you find yourself confronted by one, it’s probably a good idea to remove either the snake or yourself from the scene. Now!

Unfortunately, when we find ourselves confronted by our shame, it’s not that easy.

We all feel shame. Sometimes it’s minimal. Sometimes it’s massive. Shame may be grounded in a single tragic occurrence or in the accumulation of many small experiences, actions, feelings, or thoughts. It doesn’t matter where it comes from...shame is shame is shame.

Like our shadow, it sticks to us. We can’t just say to our shame, “Go away!” We can’t run from it. Can’t ignore it. Can’t deny it. Meanwhile, it wreaks havoc upon our well-being, gnawing away at our joy, our energy, and our love of life.

So what can we do with our shame?

Rather than running from it, we can face it. Rather than denying its existence, we can actually engage it in a constructive internal dialogue. Most importantly, we can have compassion for it. (This is probably the last thing our shame expects of us!)  Because our shame sticks so closely to us, when we show compassion toward it, we show compassion toward ourselves. When we soften our judgment against it, we soften our judgment against ourselves...and deep, lasting healing can begin. 

What might such compassion look like?

In a word: Forgiveness. When Jesus’ disciple and friend Peter asked, “…how often should I forgive? As many as seven times?"  Jesus replied, "Not seven times, but, I tell you, seventy-seven times,” (Matthew18: 21-22 NRSV) In other words, don't bother keeping track.

Jesus wasn't just talking about the healing power of forgiveness in our relationships with those around us. He was also talking about the healing and transformation that forgiving ourselves can bring.

Forgiveness has the power to remove the venom of shame from our lives. It is a concrete way of showing compassion to ourselves and, unlike all the other ways we’ve tried to deal with our shame...

...this one actually works!