HOW TO LOVE YOUR LIFE

To love our lives
we must do for life
what Life does for us.
Truly, it is our high privilege
and holy purpose
to do that which,
by its own model,
Life begets and beckons us to do.

Life gives itself to us,
sacrifices itself for us,
while it cherishes us,
forgives us,
nurtures us,
defends us,
humbles us,
celebrates us,
rejoices in us,
empowers us,
encourages us,
watches over us,
advocates for us,
uses itself up for us.

In other words,
ultimately,
bit by bit,
moment by moment,
and day by day. . .

Life dies for us,
rises up in us,
lives on through us.

Jesus said, “I am the resurrection and the Life.” (John 11:25)

LOVE'S LOOKING BACK

O Invisible yet everywhere,
there is no “where” that you are not.
You are the essence in everything,
the infinite in every “every.”
Even now,
you are here.

You gaze at us
And we at you.
And when we do
we gaze into your very face,
into the face of God,
into the face of Life,
into the face of Reality,
into the face of Truth,
into the face of Being,
into the very face of Love.

O Invisible yet everywhere,
we can miss the sheer nearness of you.
Or worse, we can miss the you-ness of you.
Unaware,
while busied to the point of distraction,
or myopically intent upon our delusions,
or unfamiliar with the far flung reaches of seeing,
we can miss you.

And,
we can miss the you that is looking back at us.
And with it, we can miss your look of love—
the original look of Love.
And,
we can miss the you that is
longing to connect with us,
that is hoping we will see the you who are the "is"
in all things.

Still, you invite us to see
into yourself.
into your self
to perceive,
to experience,
and to know the you--
in all that is,
in all that happens to us,
in all that we do.

And when we see this you,
the invisible becomes visible!

When these moments come--be they but glimpses
in which we realize that it’s really you we are looking at—
with each of them,
you bless us,
you fill us,
you quiet us.
you keep us.
For we are actually seeing love
And it’s you looking back at us.

“The Lord bless you and keep you. The Lord make his face shine upon you, and be gracious to you. The Lord turn his face toward you and give you peace.”  Numbers 6:24-26

ONLY YOU

Write the poem only you can write.
Build the bridge only you can build.
Tell the story only you can tell.
Be the friend only you can be.
Sing the song only you can sing.
Pray the prayer only you can pray.
Follow the dream only you can follow.
Give the gift only you can give.
Believe the miracle only you can believe.
Take the chance only you can take.
Bear the burden only you can bear.
Bring the joy only you can bring.
See the light only you can see.
Change the world only you can change.
Share the peace only you can share.
Take the path only you can take.
Live the life only you can live.
Be the person only you can be.

WITH...YOU

This new “breath prayer” came during the night while I was trying to get back to sleep. With it came the thought of using my breath and breath prayer as a means of carrying my meditation thoughts into my day, my actions, my Life. Here are some thoughts that came on this theme of with you...

God, I forget so easily and quickly my deeper, truer self. Somehow something as simple as a breath prayer keeps me remembering this most essential point or meaning of my existence. It seems that this is what you desire of me, God; that I know and ever more deeply know that you are with me and I am with you always. Everywhere. (This certainly seems to be the purpose of contemplative prayer. From it comes potential for instant transformation here and now. Any insights or messages that may come from such prayer—the simpler the better—are often an affront to my ego, which resents having to acknowledge my need to “dumb down”—typical egoic condescending language). The very fact that this message; with you is simple and that it doesn’t somehow feed my ego gives to me pause to believe that it is soul-sourced, legitimized, true and worthy. World call me crazy but I believe that the very simplicity and novelty of it is proof that it comes straight from you, God.

We humans don’t have to wander aimlessly through the mystery of you. We don’t have to wonder in order for your simple truths to be effectual in our lives either. We, in trust, can just know this “with you” insight to be true. In so far as we do, it can be our stake in the ground, our ground of being, our mooring throughout this and each day. In other words, existentially, it can be all that matters…the sum total of all our journeying (be it physical or spiritual)—because it is the very path itself. It is one expression of the totality of our being. In comparison, nothing else matters.

Have you somehow hidden this truth from me until now? No. Never. Have I had difficulty seeing it…and remembering it? Yes. Always! Today I feel you saying that trusting in your words ”with you,” as core to human self-understanding, is all that truly matters. All else—all other “matters”, especially the ones that seem paramount in my thinking, simply pale in comparison and ultimately fade into nothingness. Nothingness! All the things I consider so vital and crucial…in light of with you…all of them seem to be so completely ego-centric…the “weight and sin that clings so closely” that St. Paul urges us to lay aside (Hebrews 12:1 NRSV).

This means with you is ultimately freeing!!! Through these two words I can see that it is my ego…and only my ego…that is keeping me from sharing what I experience to be incredible insights that you give to me/to each of us in these meditative moments. Or to put it another way, focusing all that I am on with you instantly frees and transforms me into an alternative way of being and living. “What can and will change when I ground my being (my Life) in this one single truth?” This question is so radical and the answer so expansive that, once again, I can get only glimpses of answers.

What can I do to make a difference in this self-destructing world, I ask myself. With you is one expression of the answer, isn’t it God? If I will just live this I can give up my fear and anxiety about what others think of me. If I will just do this, I can live with greater honestly and integrity. If I will just do this, I can live altruistically and with great love for all.

Do I have the spiritual courage to share these, today’s insights? They are so fresh and real, so invigorating, orienting and empowering, so utterly different from most of my (and the world’s) thinking. My ego, as usual, is speaking from both sides of its mouth saying, “Yes, Jer, put it out there. They will love you!” and at the same time, “Absolutely not, Jer! You couldn’t possibly have anything worth saying to the world!”

But there is an alternative voice…the voice of my soul (which is where you reside, God) which is speaking a very different message. It is saying, “Yes, Jer…you do have something to say to the world (as each person does)—a version of truth so personal that only you can say it—and yet so universal that absolutely everyone who wishes to do so will be able to relate to and understand it.”

“What is the difference I can make…and make now?” each of us ponders from time to time. I hear you answering that question for me today God, with...“Just share what I share with you that makes all the difference in your world.” So ironically, you’re saying that the “difference” I can make is in helping others see how we are all alike when it comes to you…that each of us in our own way, longs to understand and experience the invigoration, the clarity and the empowerment of what you mean by with you.
And that’s your deepest desire, too



“And remember, I am with you always, until the end of the age.” (Jesus’ words in Matthew 28:20 NRSV)

CLOSER THAN SKIN ON SKIN

A different kind of prayer; this is what I’m here to learn, isn’t it God. A new kind of prayer where I’m not asking, asking, asking or even thanking, thanking thanking. It's simply being with you long enough to realize that you are in me and I am in you. Instead of running away from a sheer silence, it’s staying in place long enough to let it run into me, through me. You, I see now, are that silence, God. You are not only in the solitude. You are the solitude.

We humans are always running either toward or away from you. But there is no running to be done, is there? It’s in the cessation of running that we deeply experience your presence--and just as deeply discover who we are. We discover that you are fully present, that is, present in all your fullness. In other words, you are always here, always now...so that we can be the same; fully present here and now...with you and with each other.

That's your standing invitation isn't it; for us to be fully present to, with, and finally, in you. This is true prayer, and new prayer..."new"because it makes us new. It takes some getting used to, God. Feels elusive, but it’s not. You are closer than skin on skin...closer than my breath to me…closer than each beat of my heart. True prayer is the continuous re-cognition of this, your presence...your fullness. Nothing less. And there is nothing more.

To pray without ceasing is to carry this awareness into every notion, every emotion, every action, every transaction.

"Rejoice always, pray without ceasing, give thanks in all circumstances..." 

(I Thessalonians 5: 16-18a NRSV)

MOMENT OF IMPACT

God,
help me become more deeply aware
of the words that I choose
and the impact they have,
especially the impact I miss
at the moment I’m speaking them.

I use words so loosely.
I spread them about so profusely,
while striving to convey exactly what it is
that I've convinced myself
is so important
for someone else to hear.

But often, in my exuberance
to persuade others of what
their take on reality should be,
I trample bullishly
through the lush garden of their own equally
(if not more valuable)
words, thoughts, feelings.
In short, I tread foolishly upon their perspective
which might actually be
your cleverly disguised wisdom,
given to me,
through them.

“Let the words of my mouth and the meditation of my heart be acceptable to you, O Lord…(Psalm 19:14 NRSV)

GIVE IT TIME

This is all the inner journey
in and into You
is asking of me:
Give it time.

Which translates:
Give it my here and my now
Give it my full-bodied and focused attention
Give it my willingness and my willfulness
Give it my humility and my humanity
Give it my energy and my honesty
Give it my best and my worst.

Suddenly,
it sounds like a lot,
like way too much.
But, ironically, I know
it’s not.

In fact
it’s nothing,
a pittance compared to what You give me
if and when
I do it.

SOUL POND

Like a small smooth stone
I descend
Into the cool quiet pool
Some call prayer.
Noiselessly I merge
With an ancient world.
Though ever new to me
It has been here all along;
The old in the new
The inner in the outer.
Rippling the surface
For only an instant,
I sink into its depths.
Here I find
My self,
The self that is nowhere else
To be found.
In fact, here I learn
Self is too small a word.
And here I discover that you, God, lead me.
Beside stilling waters
You restore my hot and restive soul,
Recreating in me a pure heart,
A quieted mind,
And a newborn sense
Of the who
that is me.

MY UNDOING

As you know all too well, God,
many things have the power to undo me;

Maybe it’s something bad that happens
Maybe its an offensive remark sent in my direction (or so my ego thinks!)
Maybe it’s my own emotions getting the better of me

And that's on a good day

Sometimes life is seeking my demise—
or so it seems

But I want you to be the one who undoes me, God.
You are the one whom I can trust unreservedly
With you I feel wholly safe

You undo me lovingly
with my well-being
in your mind
and in your heart

In fact,
what feels like you undoing me is really the opposite…
it is you doing me
It is you building me up not tearing me down
It is you putting me together not taking me apart
It is you bringing me to life...
and love

You give me your stalwart strength
You give me your ever-expanding perspective
You even give me your serenity

It is you re-creating your very self in me…through me…out of me.

Be my undoing, God.
Please.

"Create in me a clean heart, O God, and put a new and right spirit within me." Psalm 51:10 NRSV

THE GOD EXPERIENCE

The “God experience” is what the Bible is all about.

This is what the story of Sarah, the wife of Abraham, and her impossibly-late-in-life pregnancy was all about: (“The LORD appeared to Abraham near the great trees of Mamre while he was sitting at the entrance to his tent in the heat of the day...Now Sarah was listening...” Genesis 18:1ff).

It is what the story of Moses’ receiving the Ten Commandments on the mountaintop was all about: (“The LORD said to Moses, “Come up to me on the mountain and stay here, and I will give you the tablets of stone…” Exodus 24:12ff).

It was at the heart of Elijah’s hearing that “still small voice” in the sheer silence: (“He said, "Go out and stand on the mountain before the Lord, for the Lord is about to pass by."  I Kings 19:11ff)

It was what Jesus’ mother experienced in her encounter with the angel Gabriel (“In the sixth month the angel Gabriel was sent by God to a town in Galilee called Nazareth, to a virgin…The virgin's name was Mary. And he came to her and said, "Greetings, favored one! The Lord is with you." Luke 1:26ff)

It was what Jesus experienced on the day of his baptism (“And when Jesus had been baptized, just as he came up from the water…a voice from heaven said, "This is my Son, the Beloved, with whom I am well pleased." Mt 3:15ff)

It was Peter’s experience on the Mount of Transfiguration (“…Jesus took with him Peter and James and John, and led them up a high mountain apart, by themselves. And he was transfigured before them, 3 and his clothes became dazzling white…” Mark 9:2ff)

It was the Pentecost experience (“When the day of Pentecost had…All of them were filled with the Holy Spirit…” Acts 2ff).

It was Paul’s experience on the road to Damascus (“Now as he was going along and approaching Damascus, suddenly a light from heaven flashed around him. 4 He fell to the ground and heard a voice saying to him, "Saul, Saul, why do you persecute me?" 5 He asked, "Who are you, Lord?" The reply came, "I am Jesus…” Acts 9:3ff)

From the Book of Genesis to the Book of the Revelation, the whole purpose of the Bible and every individual part of it seems to be to reveal what an actual and authentic experience of God can look like in our lives.

Further, its purpose is to put on display what an actual relationship with God looks like.

Finally, story after story, the Bible demonstrates what transformative power such personal experiences and such a personal relationship offer us.

What are we waiting for?

THE SOUL'S QUIVER

It is difficult if not impossible…

…to unhook completely from our ego’s incredible grip upon our psyche.

Insofar as we are able to do so, it is only through that within us that is even more powerful than our ego.

That would be our soul.

The soul, the medium or essence of God within us,

fights only with love.

Like God, it doesn’t do battle with the ego…or at least, it doesn’t play the ego’s game.

Its weapons include forgiveness, mercy, compassion, inner clarity, joy, peace, thankfulness, awareness and self-control.

These are the “arrows” in love’s quiver.


"But the fruit of the Spirit is love, joy, peace, forbearance, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, 23 gentleness and self-control." (Galatians 5:22-23a NRSV)

ON WINGS OF WILDNESS

Into the wild I come
And You are here
You throw mountains together
And fling planets apart
You bless my life with just such wildness and freedom.

Giving me hope, a wild, wild thing,
You bring me into the wild place of your love
You break me forth from my self-said bounds
You crown me with laurels of ever-expanding thoughts.

Like a sea, your wildness seeps into and out of my being
Inundating me, undulating me.
You take me, toss me, turn me, trust me.

There is no wild place that you do not call home
No place where you are not at ease and in repose
Even in the midst of all that is dead within me
You bring me safely through the worlds of “Unknown!” and “Beware!”

You carry me on the wings of your wildness there...here
The wind of your Spirit beckons me,
“Come away, my beloved”
And I come.

You call me into the wildness that is in all
Gladly, gladly I come.
For I know, you are calling me
Into You.

"My beloved speaks and says to me: "Arise, my love, my fair one, and come away; 11 for now the winter is past, the rain is over and gone. 12 The flowers appear on the earth; the time of singing has come, and the voice of the turtledove is heard in our land. 13 The fig tree puts forth its figs, and the vines are in blossom; they give forth fragrance. Arise, my love, my fair one, and come away. (Song of Songs 2:10-13 NRSV)

THAT'S LIFE

 “Do what you love…in love…for love.”

While in prayer last night, this thought (or leading as I call it) came to mind—and did so in a moment of inner silence without prior conscious provocation.

First, the still small voice that lies deep within each of us said, “Do what you love.”

More silence.

Then, after several moments, came the words “…in love...” 

More silence.

Finally, after several more minutes, came “…for love.”

“Do what you love…in love…for love.” 

Simple to the point of being simplistic and even cliché, this is a very obvious, rich, and compassionate “train” of thought. The whole three-part phrase is directive yet wide open for us to fill in each of the train cars with our own interpretation of what these words might mean for us personally.

But where did they come from?

Personally, I think they came from the Holy Spirit.

Hello? Are you still there?

Just what is the “Holy Spirit?”

Not magic. Not mystical. Not made up.

It is life’s innate energy to create life out of Life. Some people personify this life force, calling it God (but even this name is limiting and subject to frequent—and even abusive—misinterpretation.)

Why do I suspect this came from the Holy Spirit? Because it just sounds like something the Holy Spirit would say—and has been "saying" to the world for a very long time.

Like a loving parent this ancient yet timeless penchant of Life-for-life guides and gives.

In the thought, “Do what you love...in love…for love,” it gently nudges us toward Life and life-granting choices.

Then it gives to each of us the ultimate gift saying, “Now, you get to decide on the outlook, attitude, perspective and approach you want to use toward your life…toward me…toward every other being…and toward the world as you see it today.

In other words, it gives us the freedom to choose, hoping (but never forcing) we will choose to do what we love…in love…for love.

That’s Life...with a capital "L."


"When the Spirit of truth comes, he will guide you into all the truth;" (John 16:13a NRSV)

BENEATH THE CRUST

Who am I?

The “who” I am on the outside is just the crust--sometimes crusty. This me is obvious to both of us—and everyone else, whether they see it for what it is or not. Fortunately, I like the crust of most things…pie, pizza, artisan bread, prime rib, etc.

But who am I on the inside…at the next level deeper?

Of course, there is the “me” I know through my ego. Others recognize this me even at times when I don’t. Unfortunately, my ego is not exactly what I would call unbiased. Worse! It seems to take on a life of its own. Sometimes I think it’s my best friend when actually, it’s my worst enemy.

Is there a “me” tucked even deeper in…deep beneath my ego? What button on the self-elevator do I press to get down to this floor? Seems to me this is the level of my soul…the true, raw and beautiful essence of who I am…and am becoming.

I know precious little about the person I am down here, God. Far beneath my crust, being at this soul level feels like I’m traveling in a foreign land—at times exciting, at times frightening, and almost always full of surprises.

I will say, here I gain alluring glimpses of something I can only imagine to be my essential being. Here I see through my ego to one who is peaceful and pliable…one who is full of joy and unthreatened…one who is pleasantly open to your life-giving, life-transforming presence.

This, I know, is your realm, God…the realm of true Life...the "kingdom of heaven" which Jesus spoke of living from, within and toward. It's the level to which you beckon us, in which you meet us, and through which your Spirit invites us to know all things.

Including you.

"The thief comes only to steal and kill and destroy. I came that they may have life, and have it abundantly." (John 10:10 NRSV)

THE REAL RESURRECTION

Most of us have come to believe that “resurrection” as something that happens to us after we die...if we're good or lucky!

Literally.

Like God resurrected Jesus.

Jesus, however, suggested something very different—and much bolder: that resurrection happens first in us and then through us just as it happened in him and then through him—and not at his death—but long before, at his baptism.

All the healings, all the miracles, all the parables, all the beatitudes, all the moments of deep insight and soaring enlightenment he brought to people like Nicodemus, the rich young ruler and Mary’s sister Martha and even to the occasional religious or political authority who was receptive to his message, portray a far broader, richer and, at the same time, more immediate—even urgent—definition of resurrection as something life-giving here and now.

Jesus understood resurrection not just as God's response to one's final moment of death but as a way of living one's life…as something in which we actively participate and so help bring into being—into reality in our own lives, into the lives of those around us and ultimately, into the life of the world.

Yes, resurrected life is happening to us moment by moment, breath by breath, heartbeat by heartbeat, but isn’t actually complete or fulfilled until it happens through us as it did in and through Jesus.

The most relevant Easter question is not, “Was Jesus literally resurrected from death?” but rather, “Am I open to being—and seeing—and participating in God’s on-going resurrection just as Jesus was?” After all, this is what has the power to make all things new in and through us.

Any lesser understanding of Jesus’ resurrection is far too small for God…or you...or me.

“See, I am making all things new!” (Rev. 21:5 NRSV)

THE HEART OF HOLY WEEK

 What makes Holy Week holy?

Jesus’ seven last words, spoken just before his death on a cross, offer us a concise summary of what he believed (and practiced). In short, it's what makes Holy Week holy. Here’s what he said accompanied by one interpretation of each "last word."

“Father, forgive them for they know not what they are doing.” (Lk 23:34)
Let’s practice forgiveness as one of the personal hallmarks of our way of being in the world. The world (and we) will be better for it.

“I thirst.” (Jn 19:28) 
Let’s practice recognizing we are humans with physical bodies, which have real needs that, if and when addressed, will teach us how to live healthy, transformative lives.

“My God, my God, why have you forsaken me?” (Mt 27:46)
Let’s commit ourselves to practicing deep honesty—even when it comes to acknowledging our doubts about God.

“Today you shall be with me in paradise.” (Lk 23:43)
Let’s practice speaking genuine words of hope to others, especially when they are in crisis, feeling fearful or deeply troubled.

“Woman, behold your son. Son, behold your mother.” (Jn 19:26-27) 
Let’s practice the kind of compassion that is more than an emotion—a compassion that reveals itself in proactively identifying and addressing the needs of those around us.

“It is finished.” (Jn 19:30) 
Let’s practice affirming and celebrating that our lives include a spiritual dimension—and that each (and every) person is integral to the much larger picture of God’s love for all of creation.

“Into your hands I commend my spirit.” (Lk 23:46) 
Let’s practice courageously entrusting our whole lives—past, present, future—to God’s grace-grounded love...and do so beginning with this very moment.

The seven last words of Christ are not just at the heart of Holy Week. They reveal the heart of Jesus Christ. After all, he is the heart of Holy Week. Practicing his words throughout our lives is what makes this—and every other week—holy.

METAPHORICALLY SPEAKING

“Language is a cracked kettle on which we beat out tunes for bears to dance to, while all the time we long to move the stars to pity.”  Gustave Flaubert (French Novelist, born 1821)

All language is metaphor.

Though some are more obvious than others, every single word in the previous quote is a metaphor—that is, a symbol or representation—which, when combined with the metaphors surrounding it, creates a picture in our minds.

This is precisely Flaubert's point. Language can create lovely pictures by combining words, but it is also limited by and to those words…which is why the more complex our thoughts, feelings and experiences become, the more words (read: metaphors) we need to describe them.

Jesus knew this.

He used this knowledge not only to help people understand the meaning of his life-transforming message. He used it to describe himself broadly enough so that people could come to know him--referring to himself as “the way, the truth, the life” (John 14: 6), the “light of the world” (John 8:12), the “good shepherd” (John 10:14)--to name just a few of his many self-describing metaphors.

What about the word “God?”

Is "God" the only metaphor we can use to describe something as rich and varied, as simple and complex, as personal and universal—and as deeply experiential—as what we’re attempting to communicate when we use the term?  Or is it just one drop in the ocean?

"If you continue in my word, you are truly my disciples; and you will know the truth, and the truth will make you free." (John 8:31-32 NRSV)

THE GOD ONLY YOU CAN KNOW

Look at how we relate to each other.

Based on personal experience, we know there are certain dynamics all of our one-on-one relationships have in common. These dynamics range from love to hate, loyalty to rejection, forgiveness to revenge, intimacy to estrangement, etc.

Pick any one of your close relationships.  Notice how, the more “personal” it is, the easier it is to identify with these different dynamics. Relationally speaking, we have a lot in common with each other.

After all, isn’t this is why we all love a good love story? We can relate!

But, if we peer into the particulars of any one of our relationships more deeply we see something else: Absolutely every single relationship we have is unique and different from all the rest. In fact, the more intimate the relationship is, the more unique it becomes. At this writing, the world’s population is estimated to be 7,493,618,067, yet put any two of us together, and the resulting relationship will be different every single time.

Why would it be any different when it comes to God?

For each of us, our one-on-one relationship to God is wonderfully unique and personal—even intimate—and is meant to be so! This doesn’t mean we all know different “Gods.” It means we all know God differently. In other words, we each have a relationship with the God that only we can know.

TAKE IT PERSONALLY

What kind of advice is that?!

Ever since being children we’ve been told, “Don’t take it personally!”—no matter what ‘it’ is. No doubt, this is advice that serves us well most of the time. But depending upon the context, the opposite of such sage counsel might be just as helpful—or even more so.

Never mind who said or did it!

If we are willing to engage in a little self-reflection upon something painful that someone has said or done to us—something that we would normally “take personally” [read: “be offended by”]—we may gain surprisingly deep awareness into ourselves and our modus operandi. Doing so offers us much more than just insight. It can stimulate our own emotional health and well-being and even promote personal transformation.

The biggest stumbling block to accomplishing this is our ego.

This is the gist of what Jesus was talking about in his Sermon on the Mount when he discourages us from focusing on the speck we’re so quick to see in someone else’s eye while overlooking the log in our own. Utilizing unusually abrupt language, he drives home a point that actually has the power to positively transform us—and our relationships—if we will apply it.

But…

It’s a point that you and I won’t even “get” unless we’re willing to take it personally.

“You hypocrite, first take the log out of your own eye, and then you will see clearly to take the speck out of your neighbor's eye.” (Mt 7:5 NRSV)

WHO WASN'T ATTRACTED TO JESUS?

Isn’t it interesting that children were attracted to Jesus? 

As was blind Bartimaeus, the tax collector Zaccheaus, the synagogue official Jairus, the Samaritan woman at the well, the wise Nicodemus, the hemorrhaging woman, the mute demoniac, the disciples, foreigners like the "gentile" Roman centurion, a mix of prostitutes, orphans, widows, sick and leprous, poor and powerless and many, many others. It seems they all sensed Jesus' receptivity, affirmation and safety.

Who, then, wasn’t attracted to Jesus? 

Many of the religious officials--temple and synagogue priests, Roman authorities, lay synagogue leaders like the scribes and Pharisees, the wealthy and the well placed like the rich young ruler--considered the same Jesus as unnerving, threatening and dangerous. They wanted nothing to do with him. In fact, many of them wanted to do away with him.

Did the former group, children included, somehow know that this Jesus offered them something they couldn’t get for themselves? Were the latter, both knowingly and unknowingly, so full of themselves and their ego-driven agendas that there was no need—in deed, no room—for anyone else in their lives? God, included?!

“Who wasn’t attracted to Jesus…and more importantly, why weren’t they?” These are good questions to ask ourselves when we leave God out of our picture.  

“...but Jesus said, "Let the little children come to me, and do not stop them; for it is to such as these that the kingdom of heaven belongs."  (Matthew 19:13-14 NRSV)

LEARNING TO STEER

Last week we considered a tricycle as a metaphor for using prayer to navigate the complexities of life and perhaps discover new ways of making a difference in the world. In this metaphor one wheel represents the part of our prayers having to do with thanking God, a second wheel represents asking God, and a third wheel represents listening deeply (and without an agenda!) for God. 

Today, using the same metaphor, I’d like to suggest that the “listening” wheel, whether we call it contemplation, centering prayer, meditation, reflection time, etc., is actually the best wheel to use for steering the tricycle we call our life. (Again, while these popular terms may connote different things to different people, all are variations on the theme of listening.)

In his historic 2012 Address to the Synod of Bishops in Rome, 104th Archbishop of Canterbury Rowan Williams offered an excellent explanation for why this may be true:

“[Contemplation] is very far from being just one kind of thing that Christians do: it is the key to prayer, liturgy, art and ethics, the key to the essence of a renewed humanity that is capable of seeing the world and other subjects in the world with freedom--freedom from self-oriented, acquisitive habits and the distorted understanding that comes from them. To put it boldly, contemplation is the only ultimate answer to the unreal and insane world that our financial systems and our advertising culture and our chaotic and unexamined emotions encourage us to inhabit. To learn contemplative practice is to learn what we need so as to live truthfully and honestly and lovingly. It is a deeply revolutionary matter.”[1]

Jesus’ prayer in the Garden of Gethsemane suggests that he didn't just talk. He listened for God’s guidance (that is, he practiced contemplation) regarding the most significant decision he would ever make…"My Father, if it is possible, let this cup pass from me; yet not what I want but what you want." (Matthew 26:39)...and then followed it.

The rest is history.

[1]http://rowanwilliams.archbishopofcanterbury.org/articles.php/2645/

archbishops-address-to-the-synod-of-bishops-in-rome.

PRAYER IS LIKE A TRICYCLE

One wheel is thanking God.

When someone gives us a thoughtful gift or does something very kind for us, we are touched. Moved. We want them to know we feel a deep sense of gratitude, so we do what comes naturally; we thank them. When we experience what we call blessing or goodness or abundance in our lives, again, we are naturally moved to thank someone. In the context of prayer, that someone is God.

Another wheel is asking God.

When things go wrong in our lives or we learn of a pressing need (e.g. for physical, relational, or emotional healing) felt by someone we love we often turn to God in prayer. To do so comes naturally, in part, because many of us were taught to ask God for help in our earliest bedtime prayers…and we’ve never stopped asking! This is good. Even Jesus taught his disciples to do so using the most famous biblical prayer of all…the Lord’s Prayer (Matthew 6:9-13).

These two wheels of prayer are critical and valuable. But there’s one more…listening to God. And this isn’t the kind of listening where we do it just long enough to think of our response or rebuttal to what we're hearing. This is listening without an agenda.

Virtually all religions include this third wheel of prayer. People have different names for it (contemplation, centering prayer, meditation, reflection time, etc.), but what name we assign to it is far less important than what it is!

Because it’s so different from the first two wheels of prayer, this one takes some practice. And, if you’re not already doing this, it’s understandable. To carve a niche out of our in our already-full lives to listen attentively for God may seem impossible, if not a little crazy. But seriously, what do you have to lose? And who knows? You may be delightfully surprised and moved by the experience. Further, the ensuing spiritual adventure may give you new-found perspective and courage to rethink some parts of your life that may not be working so well. Even 15 -20 minutes a day for a week can begin to open our eyes to a wonderfully refreshing and transforming way of navigating the complexity of life...as well as discovering brand new ways of making a difference in the world.

Most of all, you’ll begin to experience what it’s like to move through life on the wheels of a truly personal and life-transforming relationship with God.

"Be blessed, God; train me in your ways of wise living. (Psalm 119:12 NRSV)

YOU MAKE MY LIFE BEAUTIFUL

I love the way, the ways, you make my life beautiful
You surround me with beauty
You enfold me and immerse me in your ways of seeing it
You delight in it…and it delights me
A maker of beauty, you make my life beautiful

          I love the way, the ways, you shift my center
          So I can see beauty through your eyes
          So I see what I wouldn’t otherwise see
          Giving joy to my spirit, lightness to my soul
          A seer of beauty, you make my life beautiful

I love the way, the ways, our eyes look at the same thing
Yet yours see beauty where mine don’t
You even see beauty in me when I can’t
And you sculpt the beauty that lies within the stone of me
A shaper of beauty, you make my life beautiful

         I love the way, the ways, you fill me with beauty
         My soul and my surroundings
         You fill me with its impressions, its expressions
         Everywhere I look…if only I will look
         A beaker of beauty, you make my life beautiful

I love the way, the ways, you help me build bridges of beauty
Bonding the playful, whimsical to the thoughtful, inspiriting
The momentary and temporal to the eternal and divine
The physical to the spiritual
A bridge of beauty, you make my life beautiful

          I love the way, the ways, you give witness to the beauty you see
          In nature’s splendor around you, in you, through you
          In situations and circumstances beyond your control
          A herald of beauty, you make my life beautiful

I love the way, the ways, you aren’t just a maker of beauty
Not just a seer, a shaper, a beaker, a bridge, a herald of beauty
I love the way, the ways, you are beautiful
More, you are beauty itself

LOVE'S DEEPEST LONGINGS

Who can you share your innermost thoughts, feelings and fears with? Who can you give your deepest self to with abandon and never regret it? Who can you trust will never be tempted to share your secrets? Who will never betray, deny or sabotage you? Who will love you more than you love yourself…even when you don’t?

We need someone who knows us better than we know ourselves. We need someone who will be more honest than we are willing to be with ourselves, someone who refuses to play the games and who refuses to let us play them either.

Valentine's Day, with its "romantic" love is a beautiful thing. But considering the complexity of the human experience, it's easy to see we need someone who will love us with something deeper and longer lasting.

We need someone who, unlike us, hasn’t honed their human rationalization skills to a razor-sharp edge. We need someone whose first reaction is not to be defensive. We need someone who won’t back away from integrity no matter what the cost—and will lovingly speak the truth about our own lack thereof. We need someone who won’t justify our egocentric approach to everything and everyone. We need someone who isn’t living in constant denial of the realities right in front of us. We need someone who will help us see what we can’t see with our own limited vision, be it physical or spiritual. We need someone who will help us see that we are worthy of receiving love and are worthy of giving love.

In other words, we need someone who will help us see that we're each as beautiful and lovely as a rose...but we're not the only bloom on the bush.

That someone is God.

“As a deer longs for flowing streams, so my soul longs for you, O God.” (Psalm 42:1 NRSV)

SHAME SHADOW

You may have heard the saying, “If you see a snake, never mind where it came from!” Sound advice when it comes to snakes. When you find yourself confronted by one, it’s probably a good idea to remove either the snake or yourself from the scene. Now!

Unfortunately, when we find ourselves confronted by our shame, it’s not that easy.

We all feel shame. Sometimes it’s minimal. Sometimes it’s massive. Shame may be grounded in a single tragic occurrence or in the accumulation of many small experiences, actions, feelings, or thoughts. It doesn’t matter where it comes from...shame is shame is shame.

Like our shadow, it sticks to us. We can’t just say to our shame, “Go away!” We can’t run from it. Can’t ignore it. Can’t deny it. Meanwhile, it wreaks havoc upon our well-being, gnawing away at our joy, our energy, and our love of life.

So what can we do with our shame?

Rather than running from it, we can face it. Rather than denying its existence, we can actually engage it in a constructive internal dialogue. Most importantly, we can have compassion for it. (This is probably the last thing our shame expects of us!)  Because our shame sticks so closely to us, when we show compassion toward it, we show compassion toward ourselves. When we soften our judgment against it, we soften our judgment against ourselves...and deep, lasting healing can begin. 

What might such compassion look like?

In a word: Forgiveness. When Jesus’ disciple and friend Peter asked, “…how often should I forgive? As many as seven times?"  Jesus replied, "Not seven times, but, I tell you, seventy-seven times,” (Matthew18: 21-22 NRSV) In other words, don't bother keeping track.

Jesus wasn't just talking about the healing power of forgiveness in our relationships with those around us. He was also talking about the healing and transformation that forgiving ourselves can bring.

Forgiveness has the power to remove the venom of shame from our lives. It is a concrete way of showing compassion to ourselves and, unlike all the other ways we’ve tried to deal with our shame...

...this one actually works!  

RESPONSE TIME

Sometimes when I listen for you, God,

All I hear is, well, nothing.

Oh, there are those glorious days when my wait time is zero.
'cause you take off like a bat out of hell!

Oops. Sorry. Me bad.
It’s true, though! Some days, I can’t keep up with you.

But other ones?
Nothing. Nada. Nyeht.

Like today.
Not a single thing. No thing. Nothing.

Wait. What?
You say you always have something to say to me?
But first, so I can hear,
You want me to relax my body...empty my mind...and open my spirit to you?
So, you're saying that's what'll happen if I just sit very still and be very quiet for a nice long time?
Oh.

(Long pause)

You still there, God?
How long is "...a nice long time?"

(Longer pause)

Okay. Okay. I get your point.
It's long enough to create a space for you to come into...a place of nothing.
Nada.
Nyeht.

(Oh, you’re good, God! You are really good.)

“Be still, and know that I am God.” (Psalm 46:10 NRSV Bible)

 

I CAN...

"Never let what you can’t do keep you from doing what you can."

These words can be helpful and motivating in virtually every situation. In the midst of escalating tensions and communal instability in our interpersonal, local, national and global relationships, now might be a good time to consider how we can apply them. Here are some ways. What might you add?

I can...
     ...be respectful no matter what, knowing that this alone will help diffuse volatility.
I can...
     ...bring calm by being calm, even when those around me are not.
I can...
     ...listen--truly listen--to what those who think differently than me have to say.
I can...
     ...admit that I don’t know everything. I have a lot to learn.
I can...
     …decide not to give in to smugness or cynicism or apathy.
I can...
     ...show compassion toward all, especially those most adversely affected in troubling times.
I can
     ...be open, even if I think whatever is happening can’t possibly be good--or bad.
I can...
     ...remember that things could be worse.
I can...
     ...make an impact with my voice, my time, my resources, my energy, my life.
I can...
     …choose not to let anything make me surrender my peace, my joy, my hope.
I can...
     ...commit to looking at things from a larger, more unifying perspective.

In life, there will always be things we can't do. So, let's be creative and courageous about all the things we can!

Finally, beloved, whatever is true, whatever is honorable, whatever is just, whatever is pure, whatever is pleasing, whatever is commendable, if there is any excellence and if there is anything worthy of praise, think about these things. (Philippians 4:8, NRSV Bible)

WHAT A VOICE!

After hearing me sing at our first rehearsal, Steve, the baritone next to me exclaimed, "What a voice!" It made me feel good.

But sadly, that wasn’t all. His compliment aroused a very old and very personal ogre that hibernates deep within my psyche, occasionally awakening to wreak havoc upon my moments of merriment. No sooner had Steve made his kind comment than my ogre spat out its interrogating curse, “Why haven’t you done more with your musical talent? We both know, you could have done so much more with it over these many years!” 

Surprising, isn’t it, how something intended as a simple and sincere compliment could so easily arouse this demon of self-doubt in me? And surprising, isn’t it, how vulnerable we are to the judgmental scripts that can rise up out of our past decisions and actions?!

“Be kind,” Johann von Goethe (1749-1832), the German philosopher said, “for everyone you meet is fighting a great battle.” I suspect that whatever great battle Goethe was referring to has different warfronts for each of us. But for many of us, at least in moments of vulnerability, self-doubt lies at our personal war’s core.

Fortunately for each of us, “Now,” that is, this very moment, always holds the potential to “outmaneuver” anything in our personal history. Right here, right now I can choose to see Steve’s compliment as something that propels me into the future rather than drags me into the past. This emancipating idea lies at the heart of Jesus’ story about the prodigal son (Luke 15:11-32 NRV) in which we’re told about a young man who “came to himself,” that is, realized that his past didn’t have to define his future. Period.

Whether we read the Bible or not, we all long to experience what this story offers: the grace of “now.” Living in the grace of now doesn’t change the past. It does something better. It puts the past in the past so we can still learn from it--but it no longer has power over us. That was then. This is now.

STANDING INVITATION

You call out to me, God.
From somewhere
beyond all my “to do” lists,
beyond my incessant needs to produce—produce—produce,
beyond my misguided attempts at always getting it right,
and then feeling badly about myself when I don't,
you call out to me.

But you don’t just call out to me.
You call me out.
You call me out of the world I think is the only world there is.
You say, "Arise, my love, my fair one, and come away..."
You beckon, "Let me speak to you as your beloved who knows only love for you...
then listen...
and listen again."

But God, much of the time, I don’t hear you.
And frankly, some of the time I don't want to hear you.
Immersion in a world that places almost all my worth on accomplishment
takes its toll.
It's what I've been taught.
I blindly follow.

Sometimes though,
amidst the din of daily life,
I do hear you.
I hear your small voice.
It stills me.
I feel what your love is saying.
I hear you calling me out of my constant doing, doing, doing,
and into my being
for my well-being.

And, I see.
This "beyond" world
that's so easy to miss
is not so much beyond as within.
This is the world of being where you dwell within me.
This is the world where you invite me to dwell within you,
so you can quiet, and comfort, and create.

I know, God.
When I do have the courage to spend even a little deep time with you,
I know you're right.
You're right about my proclivity for productivity,
my piquant for perfectionism
...and all the rest.

And so,
I accept your standing invitation once again.
Today.

“My beloved speaks and says to me: “Arise, my love, my fair one, and come away…”’ (Song of Solomon 2:10 NRS Version)

PRECIOUS LITTLE

Meditation is a form of prayer which is a time for receiving glimpses…glimpses of deeper meaning to things happening in our lives, glimpses of beauty and/or inspiration for the difficult times, glimpses of joy and peace in the midst of them, or, as I like to think of it...glimpses of Life with a capital L. I don't always experience these glimpses, but when I do I say, “Thank you, God!”

These momentary epiphanies are wonderful, but still, I want more. I'm not fully satiated--at least not for long. I don’t like to admit it, but like the bumper sticker says, “I want it all…and I want it right now.”

It appears, however, that it doesn’t work this way most of the time. Of course, God could give us the all we desire, but God seldom does. (Hopefully, there’s a good reason behind this behavior, God!) And here’s the real irony—and maybe a reason.  When we take the time to examine our own behaviors, we discover we don’t do so well when we actually do get it all--no matter what “all” is. We've heard stories about what often  happens to people who win the lottery or receive some other huge windfall of wealth. Or, consider the biblical story of spoiled excess manna (Exodus 16:1-31) and the parable of the prodigal son (Luke 15: 11-32). Or, if you're feeling particularly brave, consider your own track record.

In the material realm of our lives, all too often when we get it all we waste much of it. We really don't appreciate getting a lot any more than we appreciate getting a little...and we squander it. Or, we may even go in the opposite direction and hoard it! Insofar as this is true of our relationship to material things, might it also be true of spiritual things as well…”things” like glimpses of deeper meanings, of beauty and inspiration, feelings of joy and peace--of Life with a capital L?

Maybe God gives us precious little in the hope that we will come to perceive the infinite abundance that exists in all things, even little things, precious little things…like glimpses.

May it be so as we enter into the abundance of a whole new year...one precious glimpse at a time.